Ownership

After re-reading my last blog I realize what an asshole I am. I take responsibility for everything. I had an inkling of his personality going into this whole thing, and I should not be in the least surprised that the traits that I did not like about him are still there. Moreover, I was in essence "using" him and assuaging any pangs of guilt by telling myself that he deserved it because of the way he treated me earlier in the year. Yeah, that's totally the sign of a mature, self-aware, considerate person.
A final point would be that he could conceivably have a blog about me, and say all kinds of nasty things. I'm not perfect. I make all kinds of mistakes. There are definitely reams of things about my personality that he doesn't like. I'm sure there are many ladies out there that would trip over themselves to date him.
So there. I considered removing yesterday's blog because: a) it's unfair to him and, b) it makes me look like a jerk, but I guess I am a jerk and now it's evidenced for the world to see. Or for the four people that read my blog to see. Jerky!
I actually feel bad now. Pangs of remorse and regret. I'm a bad 'un. That was definitely a huge step back on the road to becoming a nice, zen-like person.
But dogs like me.