Blinkers... they're not just for cars anymore!

People should have blinkers. I have decided this, upon returning (yesterday) from my harrowing trip through Pacific Centre where people veered into me from various angles in an attempt to steer themselves into whichever store it was that caught their fancy. You need to signal, okay? Additionally you need to observe the minimum speed limit. It’s like these people inundated themselves with NyQuil before venturing out on their lunch break or something. Set phasers to “stun”. It was like watching some hypnotic, dreamlike dance as people moved slowly, confusedly through the stores and kiosks, eyes alighting upon glittering subjects, moving as though wading through treacle. God. What are these people like when they return to work? Someone needs to infuse their water with coffee. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t all stop and smell the roses from time to time, but when I’m on my lunch break and I’m trying to buy a pair of shoes because the Steve Madden boots that I had resoled about a month ago (for $50, no less) have apparently come unglued (like my mind): you need to hurry up and get out of my way. Yeah, so maybe there should be a “slow lane” for the confused shopper. That could help. So if you’re someone who, say, hasn’t been let out of the basement for a long time and is both intrigued and terrified by the overwhelming specter that is Pacific Centre, you could put on your blinker and turn into the slow lane. People like me could then easily bypass you instead of having to bob and weave like a boxer in order to their respective destination.